A Sardar's answers in his medical entrance exam

Sardar was giving his medical entrance exam.
He gave definitions as follows:
Antibody:
Against everybody
Artery:
Study of fine art paintings
Cardiology:
Advanced study of playing cards
CT scan:
Scanning 4 lost whistle..
Coma:
Punctuation mark
Bacteria:
Back door to a cafeteria…

A Sardar's divorce plan

A Sardar and his wife filed an application for divorce.
Judge asked: How will you divide?
You have 3 children.
Sardar replied: OK! We will apply next year.

Sardar on Bus Farts!

You are sardarji and on a bus, when you suddenly fart.

Luckily the music is very loud.

So every time you fart, you time it with the music.

When you start making your way to the door as you exit the bus

Everybody is throwing dagger looks at you, and you suddenly

realize............
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You're listening to your IPOD!

Domestic quarrel

During a domestic quarrel our Sardarji hid himself under a bed. At last his wife found him out. She asked him to come out. To this he replied: "I am not afraid of you. After all I am a man. If I say I won't come out, I won't.

The great sardar kidnap

A Sardar was down on his luck. In order to raise some money, he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.

He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you."

He then wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put 2 lakhs in cash in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A Sardar."

The Sardar then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.

The next morning the Sardar checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree.

He opened the bag and found the exact amount of money as demanded with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Sardar?"

Why do you wear that for?

Sardarji watched his flat-chested wife as she tried on her new brassiere.

'What did you buy that for?' he asked. 'You haven't got anything to put in it.'

'You wear shorts don't you?' she retorted.

Shopping in burma bazaar

One sardar came to Madras and wanted to do shopping in burma bazaar.

His tamilian friend told the Sardar that the prices will be costly and hence asked him to bargain for half the price.

Sardar went and asked the price of stereo for which the vendor told 2000 Rs. Sardar asked for Rs.1000. vendor told he can give for Rs.1800 for which sardar told no,no only Rs.900. Vendor told ok , i will give it for 1500 Rs for which sardar bargained for Rs.750.

It was going on like this when finally vendor out of irritation said he will give the Sardar the stereo free of cost. Our sardar asked whether he will give two.

Sardarji in cybercafe

Once sardarji entered a cybercafe to check his mails.It was crowded so he had to wait.As he waited he saw a man checking his mails.He stood behind him and watched.The man typed his password and was waiting when sardarji cried out "Yes yes I know your password.I can read your mails now.
"Surprised the man asked "Oh yeah, tell me what is it".
Sardarji replied " Five stars."

Fifteen inches curtain

Sardarji enters a store that sell curtains.

He tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains."

The salesman assured him that they had a large selection of pink curtains. He showed him several patterns, but Santa seemed to be having a hard time choosing.

Finally, he selects a lovely pink floral print.

The salesman asked what size curtains he needed.

Sardarji replies, "Fifteen inches."

"Fifteen inches?" asked the salesman. "That sounds very small, what room are they for?"

Sardarji tells him that they aren't for a room, they are for his computer monitor.

The surprised salesman replies, "But, sir, computers do not have curtains!"

Sardarji says, "Hellllooooooooo........I've got Windows!"

Funny short sms sardar jokes

Here are some great funny short sms jokes based on sardars. If you think you have a better sardar joke than any of the jokes listed in here, please do use the comment form to submit your jokes.

Why are sardar's immune to Mad Cow Disease?
It only affects the brain.


How do sardars go through the forest?
They take the psycho path.


Why did a sardar tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? He didn't want to wake the sleeping tablets!


What do sardars and beer bottles have in common? They are both empty from the neck up!



TEACHER: Well, at least there's one thing I can say about your son.
Sardarji: What's that?
TEACHER: With grades like these, he couldn't be cheating.

A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell. Santa does not turns up for 4 days. Lady calls again, Santa replies: I am coming daily from 4 days, I press the bell, but no one comes out.

Sardarji goes to the doctors and says, "Doctor, I cant stop my hands from shaking!"
Doctor replies, "Do you drink much?"
Sardarji says, "No, I spill most of it!"


Sardarji is at the airport.
- Name?
- Santa .
- Sex?
- Three to five times a week.
- No, no... I mean, male or female?
- Male, female, sometimes camel.
- Holy cow!
- Yes, cow, sheep, animals in general.
- But isn ´ t that hostile?
- Horse style, doggy style, any style!
- Oh dear!
- No, no! Deer run too fast! :-))


How do you make a sardar laugh on Saturday?
Tell her a joke on Wednesday.


A sardar saw a beautiful girl. He went and kissed her.
GIRL: “stupid,what are you doin…?”
Sardar: ” B.Com Final Year.



How do you keep a Sardar busy for hours?
Write "Please turn over" on both sides of a piece of paper.


How do you confuse a sardar?
You don't. They're born that way.


There was a sardar driving down the road one day. He glanced to his right and noticed another sardar sitting in a nearby field. He was in a boat rowing, with no water in sight. The sardar angrily pulled his car over and yelled at the rowing sardar, “What do you think you're doing? It's things like this that give us sardars a bad name. If I could swim, I'd come out there and kick your butt!”


Q : Why do people other than sardars likes jokes based on sardarjis so much?
A : Because they can understand them.

Message on the birthday cake

Banta Singh wishes to observe his wife’s birthday by holding a party. So he goes to arrange a birthday cake.

The salesman inquires him what message he prefers to* use on the cake.

Well he thinks for a while and tells: Let’s put, “you are not getting older you are getting better”.

The salesman demands, “How do you wish me to set it up ? ”

Sardar says, well put “You are not getting older”, at the top and “You are getting better” at the bottom.

The true fun didn’t kickoff until the cake was opened the entire party viewed the message decorated on the cake:

“You are not getting older at the top; you are getting better at the bottom”.

Recognizing a Sardar

You should be sure the person is Sardar when he:
• puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to make up his mind.
• gets stabbed in a shoot-out.
• sends a fax with a postage stamp on it.
• tries to drown a fish in water.
• thinks socialism means partying.
• trips over a cordless phone.
• takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
• At the bottom of the application where it says “Sign Here” he puts
“Sagittarius.”.
• studies for a blood test and fails.
• sells the car for gas money.
• misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.
• drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, “Airport left”, he turns ground and
goes home.
• gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.

Lie detector

An Englishman, an American and a Sardarji are called upon to test a lie detector . The Englishman says:
“I think I can empty 20 bottles of beer”. BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
“Ok”, he says, “10 bottles”.
And the machine is silent.
The American says: “I think I can eat 15 hamburgers”.
BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
“Allright, 8 hamburgers”.
And the machine’s silent.
The Sardarji says:
“I think…”,
BUZZZZZZ goes the machine.

Identification of Sardar

You can be sure it is a sardarji when somebody:

– Sends a fax with a stamp on it.
– Takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
– Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead,
– Boards another bus in extreme hurry and upon seeing it is a 23C cut (\) service, promptly gets down thinking that
the bus route is cancelled.
– Takes you to the airport and saw a sign that said, “Airport left”, he turned around and went home.
– Got locked in Furniture Shop and slept on the floor.
– At the bottom of the application where it says “Sign Here” he put Sagittarius.”
– Studies for a blood test and fails.
– Spends twenty minutes looking at an orange juice box because it said “concentrate.”
– Puts lipstick on the forehead because he wanted to makeup his mind.
– Gets stabbed in a shoot-out.

Punjab Developement

Once all Sardarji’s clubed together and decided to develop Punjab and they
wanted the Punjab as a Developed State.

Each of them started giving suggestions … finally one great Sardarji gave
a suggestion with a huge volume “Lets fight with Indian Government, get
freedom from India then, Declare war on America…. We will be definitely
defeated by America and we shall be the part of the America and then they
will obviously develop our punjab also”….

“Wow” the crowd cheered up….. there was at last a thin voice asking ……..

“What about if we win ?”

Sardar And Indian Flag

Santa singh goes to a shop to buy Indian flag.
The shopkeeper gives him a Indian flag.
Santa singh looks at it for a while and says something.
What does he say?
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Do you have anyother color in this ???

Sardar's Son at Medical School

Bantasingh : I am so proud of my son. He is at medical school.

Santasingh : Whatt is he studying ?

Banta : Oh he is not studying. They r studying him !

Sardar's Weight Loss

The doctor told Sardarji that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would
lose 34 kilos. At the end of 300 days, Sardarji called the doctor to report he had lost the weight,
but he had a problem.

"What's the problem?" asked the doctor.

I'm 2400 kms from home.